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Guy applies for Wall Street job, says he has ‘no special skills’

Guy applies for Wall Street job, says he has ‘no special skills’

lol. Maybe the guy should apply for the job of Congress.

 

 An undergraduate applicant for a summer internship at an investment bank described himself as having “no unbelievably special skills or genius eccentricities” in a cover letter to one of the firm’s execs. The exec then forwarded the letter around Wall Street, saying, “this might be the best cover letter I’ve ever received.” Hey, fancy banker dude: You work too much and your social skills are poor. Want to go on a date?

Here’s the full letter, via Forbes:

From: BLOCKED

Sent: Monday, January 14, 2013 1:14PM

To: BLOCKED

Subject: Summer Internship

Dear BLOCKED

My name is (BLOCKED) and I am an undergraduate finance student at (BLOCKED). I met you the summer before last at Smith & Wollensky’s in New York when I was touring the east coast with my uncle, (BLOCKED). I just wanted to thank you for taking the time to talk with me that night.

I am writing to inquire about a possible summer internship in your office. I am aware it is highly unusual for undergraduates from average universities like (BLOCKED) to intern at (BLOCKED), but nevertheless I was hoping you might make an exception.  I am extremely interested in investment banking and would love nothing more than to learn under your tutelage. I have no qualms about fetching coffee, shining shoes or picking up laundry, and will work for next to nothing. In all honesty, I just want to be around professionals in the industry and gain as much knowledge as I can.

I won’t waste your time inflating my credentials, throwing around exaggerated job titles, or feeding you a line of crapp about how my past experiences and skill set align perfectly for an investment banking internship. The truth is I have no unbelievably special skills or genius eccentricities, but I do have a near perfect GPA and will work hard for you.  I’ve interned for Merrill Lynch in the Wealth Management Division and taken an investment banking class at (BLOCKED), for whatever that is worth.

I am currently awaiting admission results for (BLOCKED) Masters of Science in Accountancy program, which I would begin this fall if admitted. I am also planning on attending law school after my master’s program, which we spoke about in New York. I apologize for the blunt nature of my letter, but I hope you seriously consider taking me under your wing this summer. I have attached my resume for your review. Feel free to call me at (BLOCKED) or email at (BLOCKED). Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,

BLOCKED

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